We all know one person

Just over a month ago, the rock in life, my father, returned to the earth. Life seemed shattered even though I knew the time was coming faster than anticipated.   I would have this rock in life to have as a foundation to which I built my values.  One in which was hard at times, but lead me on the right path.   To be honest, I've lost more than just one rock this year. But.. What did I gain from those losses? Gratitude I have a tremendous family, large and broad.  For that alone, I am grateful.  I've learnt a lot and gained more than what I felt was necessary.  Nonetheless, gifts of life's experiences were given and I am grateful.  Here is my list of things to do with those you love.. 1. Don't pass the opportunity to tell someone you love them.   2. Let them know the gifts they've given, not just to you but to others.   3. Sit, listen and let them speak.  Listen with the intent to listen.   4...

I’m not sure where to start but this is something that I struggle with. Expressing the faith I’ve discovered over the last few years.  Someone once said, finding faith is something you do in the darkness.  This couldn’t be further from the truth for me. In time, life took a turn and while I found it harder and harder to face the truth my thoughts went to dark places to cope.  I didn’t want to become the person my life was going towards.  After all, I had not been happy for years, it became worse and I could see the end, and it did not bode well.   I confess the challenges that were in my life were a result of misdirected choices, failures and lack of strength to stand up for myself.  Everyone else came first and happiness was found in my life by serving others.  This isn’t a bad thing for most however, in that process I forgot who I was.   Starting therapy with the grace of my boss at the time, he held cover for me while I attended.  ...

I once read a quote from Winston Churchill, "We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give." and it struck me, stuck with me and essentially molded me.  Even at mid age in life, I could say, this old dog can still learn new things.   A few years back, I decided to leave the corporate world to do what I thought was the "right thing" and was confident this was the correct path.  I left behind a good pension, benefits and security.   After all, I was not going to be that person who spoke about change but didn't live it.   Off I went to change the world.   Within 3 years I learnt exactly what Winston Churchill was trying to tell us.   Those years I experienced, were not just life changing, they were tumultuous.   3 non profits, one where my position was eliminated after 2 months, the second where the contract ended due to lack of funding then, the third where the environmen...

I can bet that at one point or another in your life you’ve had a burning question about why you are here. what is your purpose. I have, and at times It’s been a struggle.   Why did something happen?   Well, this is what I can surmise.   With all the circumstances that have been presented thus far, I have overcome them.  I reflect on how and why.   How?   While falling, I would find the reason to get up.  After time, looking back I would see that what I felt was an insurmountable climb, it was simply a step up towards something bigger. Each challenge taught me about forgiveness and love.   Knowing now, forgiveness isn’t something that happens over night but an event that happens over days, months and years.   This brings me to the answer to the question which lays within myself and in all of you. Why? To show that forgiveness isn’t just for the other person.  Forgiveness isn’t an act t...

In life, we carry a tool box that no one can see and life experiences are the tools we gain along the way.   We stumble, then learn to get back up.  Wiping with our hands, what brought us down.  Pain can teach us a lot, more on how to become resilient, becoming empathic and mostly, forgiving.   Some of the tools are brighter than others.  They teach us to fix what is wrong, to be braver and smarter each day.  When you need a tool you've learnt, no matter how hard the experience was, it will be there to help you fix things, become better, and to heal.

By now, you may know that I've had the diverse life, mostly surrounded by men.   5 brothers, and 2 sons and a few relationships. Throughout life, I've seen some ups and downs from a perspective of a woman but .. at times, listening to a guys point of view here is what I've learnt.   Women were to be at home, taking care of the family and men, they were to bring home the money, pay the bills and not worry about the next step.  Men were to be that knight in shining armour on the horse, saving the day. If a man needs a break, they were seen as "weak" or "unstable".  When a man cries or when they break down, or even ask for help, they feel they no longer "fit" for society. When a woman needs a break, she needs to heal, she requires support and love, compassion and understanding. Women have broken that glass barrier but why haven't men?  Why hasn't society stopped that thought process?  Food for thought You are at work and walk ...

Gifts, we receive them throughout life however, most of us see them as tangible items passed on to us from another.  I however, see it much differently and of course mostly due to life's experiences.   As a young girl, the neighbours would give me cookies and tea when they saw me wandering the neighbourhood alone.  Yes, the cookies and tea would fill my tummy but what they gave me was safety, security and compassion.  Of course, I didn't see it then but I do now. As a teen, I would watch in awe my father play his guitar.  I would be at his feet, singing along.  Later in life, he gifted me his guitar.  It wasn't about the present but about being present throughout his life.  He gifted me patience, love, empathy and stillness.   As a woman, one of my older brothers tried to gift one of my children his drums.  I refused them in fear of days and nights drowning in the sound of something I wasn't sure I could bare to he...