Gratitude in loss

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Just over a month ago, the rock in life, my father, returned to the earth. Life seemed shattered even though I knew the time was coming faster than anticipated.  

 I would have this rock in life to have as a foundation to which I built my values.  One in which was hard at times, but lead me on the right path.  

 To be honest, I've lost more than just one rock this year.

 But..

 What did I gain from those losses?

 Gratitude

 I have a tremendous family, large and broad.  For that alone, I am grateful.  I've learnt a lot and gained more than what I felt was necessary.  Nonetheless, gifts of life's experiences were given and I am grateful.  Here is my list of things to do with those you love..

 1. Don't pass the opportunity to tell someone you love them.  
2. Let them know the gifts they've given, not just to you but to others.  
3. Sit, listen and let them speak.  Listen with the intent to listen.  
4. Sip your coffee, tea or beer slowly with them, don't rush out.  
5. Don't judge, even if you don't agree.  
6. Eat the cake with them.
7. Laugh and cry if necessary.  Emotions are part of us so just do it.
8. Walk at their pace, beside them, not ahead or behind.
9. Be still with them.  Hold their hand, kiss their forehead.
10. Smile.  Literally every moment you are awake, be aware of your face.  Smile.. it will help you.  Trust me.  You'll notice people smiling back.
11. When you are done, do some kindness on yourself.  

 The last moment with dad in which he was aware, I told him I love him.  I was sitting on the bed, my left arm crossing his body, his right arm holding it.  My right hand his is left hand.. after telling him this, he squeezed my hand 2 times, letting me know he could hear me, I will assume he was letting me know he loved me too.  Why do I know this?  Because ..

 Every
.
Single
.
Time 
.
I went to see him, I would never, ever leave him without telling him I love him, nor would I leave without him saying it back.  I am grateful for those very moments.  

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