Three Important Words

-

Throughout our life we crave acceptance, unconditional love and safety.  It has become apparent that when these are weaved together, we believe that saying "I love you" represents those above stated.  This is not necessarily true, albeit hearing someone tell you they love you does hit a soft spot.

Now, let's put some perspective into what I feel are the three most important words. 

In any point of our lives, we develop relationships with others.  Typically, they may have similar values, goals and objectives.  That connection builds on trust and depending on yourself, can go further in any type of relationship.  

On that journey of discovery, you may find that with trust, they understand you as a person and without hesitation, they may do something unexpected.  They step up for you.  However you see it and whatever the relationship is, having another's back is the biggest indicator of trust building and love. 

That being said, the three most important words in my words are not necessarily I love you but ..


I've got you


It is displayed in different ways;

Words - I am sorry you are going through this and I'm here to listen

Actions - Picking up groceries or shovelling the sidewalk

Reaction - Standing up for someone when they are or are not around

When you or the other person in this valued relationship does not act or speak these, then it becomes apparent that they either don't have the space in their lives to support you, or they choose not to.  It is at this point, you can make the choice to use your time and energy wiser.  Be aware of these and make the decision that is best for your mental, physical and emotional well being. 

Love always,

Nicky





Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Becoming

-
Image
Having several uncompleted posts as life was happening, I lost track of time and perhaps, a bit of desire to write.  As always, I write with honesty which I was struggling with.   Today, I had a session with my counsellor.  It was amazing to hear myself speak about my journey lately. over a year ago, I was deep within what I thought was a swamp.  I could barely see through the murky waters, struggling to fight the weeds that felt as if I was being pulled down.  I'd get a glimpse of light through and kept on fighting my way forward.  Once out of the swamp and weeds, I gained my foundation and started to work upwards.  The rocks beneath my feet crumbled at times, stumbling and of course falling to my knees.  I would take moments of rest for recovery, often giving myself the grace of tears.  Not wanting to look back in fear of what was chasing me, I kept forging forward.   Today, I spoke about the journey so far and with a burst o...
Read more

What love is

-
I’ve had this sorted history of what I thought love was and for the most part, when it came to romantic relationships I’ve not had success.  After leaving my last one, I became determined to never repeat this pattern and to work on myself first.   I’ve been doing this for just over a year now and I must say, the hardest part in life at this moment is breaking old habits.  This of course, has come with friends and family who have shown me unconditional love.  I started therapy shortly after returning, becoming accountable for my actions but also, allowing all the emotions that come up to be faced fully with questions and of course, answers. This weekend was no exception. I was with a friend and they showed me something I didn’t think possible.   How to breathe through my emotions.   Their grace put a wee bit of gold on the part of my heart I thought was never going to heal.  I wanted to run when they did something innocently.  I wanted to just be a...
Read more

Deep breath, it’s okay.

-
Image
I know, it’s been tough lately.  I saw you take a deep breath and want to not speak.  They came up to you and started asking questions.  Your inner child wanted to run and hide but you said all you wanted, which wasn’t much but you did it.   Your trust level is low today and the faith you have in others wavers. I want you to know something though…  Not everyone is the same as those who hurt you.  Not everyone wants to take from you but some, want to give.  Some want to love and accept you.   It’s okay.  Take that deep breath.  You’ve gone through some difficult times but those moments gave you the fortitude to become resilient.  You’ve got this love.  It’s going to be okay.
Read more